Top Ten Weirdest Sex Toys
7th June 2012
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The results from the Student Sex Survey 2012 showed us just how kinky you all are. Inspired by your out-of-the-box bedroom antics, we have put together a list of ten of the weirdest sex toys ever.
Vampire Sex in a Can. Literally a vampire’s mouth in a can, this toy allows men to live out their Twilight/Vampire Diaries/True Blood fang-tasies without the extra trouble of having to seduce a willing female participant.
Cup Nude. This toy, cleverly disguised as a cup of instant noodles, comes complete with ‘Gently Acid Lotion’ that gives on-the-go lubrication for men who are looking for an extra-special afternoon treat.
Goat’s Eyelid Cock Ring. Invented by the Chinese in 1200AD, the cock ring made its way into public life during the Jin and Song dynasties. Not so weird, until we discovered that they were first made from the eyelids of goats, eyelashes still intact.
The Manipulator. Designed by American physician George Taylor in 1869, the monstrous manipulator is given the accolade of the world’s first vibrator. Although made of wood and leather, the steam-powered contraption proved incredibly popular with the raunchy Victorians who experienced its orgasm-inducing powers.
Head O State Obama Sex Toy. A vibrator for the more cultured consumer, this gives women the chance to experience the big ‘O’ without pulling a Monica Lewinski on Michelle. More interested in religion than politics? Then fear not, Buddha and Jesus models are also available for your enjoyment.
Pig tail butt plug. This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had none. And this little piggy got really, really scared when his tail was taken and transformed into a sinister looking butt plug and ran all the way home. 
The Auto Suck. Because driving alone can make a man horribly aroused yet unfulfilled, this DIY blow-jobber can has been designed to be plugged into any standard car cigarette lighter. From the looks of things, it could also serve as a viable replacement your broken vacuum cleaner.
Kaylani’s Foot Fetish. Foot fetishes are so talked about that they are almost mundane, but this sex toy – featuring a rubber vagina inserted into the heel of a fake, shrunken woman’s foot – is anything but.
Hotdoll for Dogs. Giving your four-legged friend the chance to enjoy doing it doggie-style. The directions for this toy suggest spraying it with ‘female-scented odour’ to make your pooch’s experience all that more enjoyable.
Vampire Sex in a Can. Literally a vampire’s mouth in a can, this toy allows men to live out their Twilight/Vampire Diaries/True Blood fang-tasies without the extra trouble of having to seduce a willing female participant.
Cup Nude. This toy, cleverly disguised as a cup of instant noodles, comes complete with ‘Gently Acid Lotion’ that gives on-the-go lubrication for men who are looking for an extra-special afternoon treat.
Goat’s Eyelid Cock Ring. Invented by the Chinese in 1200AD, the cock ring made its way into public life during the Jin and Song dynasties. Not so weird, until we discovered that they were first made from the eyelids of goats, eyelashes still intact.
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The Manipulator. Designed by American physician George Taylor in 1869, the monstrous manipulator is given the accolade of the world’s first vibrator. Although made of wood and leather, the steam-powered contraption proved incredibly popular with the raunchy Victorians who experienced its orgasm-inducing powers.
Head O State Obama Sex Toy. A vibrator for the more cultured consumer, this gives women the chance to experience the big ‘O’ without pulling a Monica Lewinski on Michelle. More interested in religion than politics? Then fear not, Buddha and Jesus models are also available for your enjoyment.
Pig tail butt plug. This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had none. And this little piggy got really, really scared when his tail was taken and transformed into a sinister looking butt plug and ran all the way home.
The Auto Suck. Because driving alone can make a man horribly aroused yet unfulfilled, this DIY blow-jobber can has been designed to be plugged into any standard car cigarette lighter. From the looks of things, it could also serve as a viable replacement your broken vacuum cleaner.
Kaylani’s Foot Fetish. Foot fetishes are so talked about that they are almost mundane, but this sex toy – featuring a rubber vagina inserted into the heel of a fake, shrunken woman’s foot – is anything but.
Hotdoll for Dogs. Giving your four-legged friend the chance to enjoy doing it doggie-style. The directions for this toy suggest spraying it with ‘female-scented odour’ to make your pooch’s experience all that more enjoyable.
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