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TNS Web Dump

6th September 2011

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cinderella pigOne night at university, after too much encouragement (and not enough consideration ) I decided it would be a good idea to get the Korean symbol for ‘strawberry biscuit’  tattooed on my wrist. This big blob of ink now sits proudly on my left wrist day after day, whilst I give it death stares, willing it to pack up and leave my epidermis.

In my defence, I wasn’t thinking it through. But this guy WimDelvoye, - (some arty artist type) had plenty of time to stop and think about what he was doing whilst tattooing a whole bunch of pigs and uploading the results to his online gallery. Yes, an online gallery of tattooed pigs.  

At no point did he think what he was doing was wrong, bad or just plain weird. This guy loves inking up little oinkers, dead or alive it would seem. Most of the tattooing takes place in China, where no one seems to be bothered that pigs are running around looking like members of the Hells Angels. I wonder if any little piggies have followed in my footsteps and had some indecipherable blobs branded onto them for life?

Speaking of indecipherable, we have here a lovely Korean chap having a stab at English karaoke. His version of ‘Touch My Body’ by Mariah Carey is here, in all its glory. Watch this and words will fail you. You could say they failed him too. He does try his best though, and you can’t knock him for sheer enthusiasm.

Sadly, the grasp of pronunciation has failed him here. But it  does goes on to be the best and worst version of this song known to man. Surely no one has heard worse?

So yes, as it has been demonstrated, a general grasp of language basics is always good to have and a lack of general speech knowledge can have disastrous consequences. Take this video.

These artificially intelligent ‘chat bots’ are supposed to be one of those freaky-smart ‘self-aware’ types, able to hold a complete conversation with a willing, live participant. They could probably outsmart most of the TOWIE crew to be fair, but that isn’t exactly a measure of intelligence, is it? But it seems that they can only hold a conversation with humans. Hooking the machines up together to have a chat just doesn’t work and gets them all agitated with each other. Quite sweet really.

From technodes to art farts now- and here we have this rather interesting artist GuidoDaniele who specialises in painting on the human body. Skin is a canvas and humans are art and all that. No tattooing of farmyard animals here, just normal paint on human skin.

The gallery is pretty impressive though, no? Well, it beats smiley faces drawn on thumbs anyway. Although after watching this next video I may not have any thumbs left. I almost chewed them completely off through this ordeal.  It’s another video from Japan here (where else?) instructing children on how to wipe their arses after using the loo.

Never has a cartoon depicted poo crumbs so vividly. I despair. I really do.

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