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TNS Web Dump

23rd August 2011

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It’s summer. So you pack up all your worldly belongings and head off in the quest for some sunshine. You go to the hotel, plonk yourself on the bed, and being British, you turn on the TV straight away. You watch, mouth agape at the foreign lovelies that are selling you stuff. Lady in a bikini holiding a pineapple and a piranha? Well, of course, she’s selling insurance. You get it, you understand. Language is no barrier.

But sometimes, just sometimes, language is a big bloody barrier and no matter what fresh hell the telly-box inflcits on you, all you can do is slam your head repeatedly into the mirror in the hope it will smash, and you can then proceed to slash your throat with the shattered glass. Sometimes, language barriers are just that frustrating, right? No more so than this advert from Japan.

What the heck is going on, is a mystery. What is being sold, is an enigma. Why the dog is dancing no one knows. I think the product may be some sort of massive cheesy crisp ball. Not unlike a circular Wotsit. It says the advert is selling 'chips' in the description but what is going on is yet to be confirmed. To be honest I’m more interested in the dog, that scary, creepy dog that seems to have been birthed from the bowels of hell.

If anyone figures out what is going on send answers on a postcard please.

Equally as weird but not nearly as frustrating to understand is this lovely little site.

An ongoing art project, members of this site basically take tiny models of people and stick them in different locations around cities, and upload photos of their efforts. Pretty simple premise really, but some of the photos are rather sweet. Sweet because it’s all little and diddy and weeny and what not. Well worth a look, even if it’s just for the miniature models alone.

Sitting CatCarrying on the ‘aw’ factor, we have this site here: 

At first it sounds normal enough. Cute enough. You hear the word ‘kitty’ and ‘cat’ and immediately melt into a blob of butter. But on closer inspection you realise HOLY SHIT, these cats are sat upright!

Take a look at the beer you’re holding. No, it hasn’t been laced with LSD. Those freaking cats are sat upright.  If your cat ever does this please do the only logical thing that can be done. Take a damn photo and upload it to the internet.

Speaking of uploading to the internet, these guys have put together a compliation of 60 Ghetto names just for your enjoyment. Yes, your enjoyment (not mine, yours). So it would be rude not to share it, wouldn’t it?

So, after all that it would probably be wise to slow down from all that excitement. It can be tiring to look at junk on the internet. You may fancy a drink. You may get your drink and decide to put some ice in it. Refreshing right? Well probably not as refreshing as actually getting a chunk of ice and chewing it. This site here celebrates the ice chewer in all their glory. These people swap ice recipes and discuss how much they just love chewing ice. Although a second glance reveals that there aren’t that many ‘active members’ of the ice chewing community. Not sure why. It may remain a mystery for all time.

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