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Men vs. women: how long will it take you to break up?


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Dithering men need one month to summon-up the courage to break-up with their girlfriends, whereas women require just six DAYS to do the deed, according to new research.

From the moment they start to feel unhappy, it takes most blokes a whopping 30 days to bring a relationship to an end.

Two-thirds of this time is spent “agonising” over the decision – often with friends, and usually always in a pub - and plotting the most tactful method of delivery.

The remainder is spent “building-up the nerve” to actually do it, a dating poll by new online break-up hub reveals.

Women, on the other hand, are considerably more decisive. By and large, they are able to ditch their fellas – and go from “unhappy to untroubled” - in a fraction of the time.

The fairer sex is not more heartless but it possesses more “get up and go” and emotional honesty to make a snap decision, respondents said.

They are also more sensitive to their partner’s feelings, and believe a “short sharp shock” is less painful than a long, drawn-out separation.

Unlike men – who mostly “wouldn’t dream” of breaking up on or near to Valentine’s Day – a little over half of women agreed that they would “dump a doof at any time of year” if they felt they had to.

Munir Bello, founder of, a tongue-in-cheek website for lovelorn “blokes and birds”, said: “It could be that men are generally less proactive than women, and that they lack the confidence to put a break-up plan – painless or otherwise – into action.

“Or it could be that men are born romantics who want nothing more than to stay with their sweethearts forever. Either way, women appear to be more adept at going from unhappy to untroubled in relationship terms.”

In a straw poll, they were asked how they would theoretically react if their current relationship “went sour”, or if either party fell “out of love or lust”.

The majority of male respondents (53%) said they would do “some serious soul searching” before making the decision to break-up.

Once they had made the “horrible decision” to part company, 54% of men predicted that they would need an average of between one and two months to “deliver the news.”

This time would be spent “discussing it with mates in the pub”, “summoning the strength and willpower” and, finally, “plotting the delivery”.

Almost all the men who were questioned (88%) believed that a “careful exit strategy” would be less upsetting for their partners.

A few romantics (16%) even said that they would happily remain in an unhappy relationship for up to six months if there was the “slightest glimmer” of hope that the flame could be rekindled. Only half the number of women said they would do the same.

Only a fifth of those men questioned said they would consider dumping their partners in mid-February because of the emotional importance of Valentine’s Day, compared to more than half of women.

Women, who were asked the same questions, responded with more conviction.

Only a quarter (23%) said they would do some “serious soul searching”, with the majority believing it would take them just six days from “start to end”.

Most (77%) also believed that a brief, frank chat was a fairer way to do things.

But a few (six%) admitted they would prefer to send a text, or post a tweet or status change on their Facebook page, rather than do it in person. Only 2% of men agreed with this approach.

All women agreed that life is too short to be with the wrong person for a “moment longer than necessary.”

Bello, who in addition to launching is the author of lad-lit novel The Break Up Recipe, added: “The difference between men and women when it comes to relationships appears to be stark. Men are happy to roll along whereas women are focused on long-term happiness.

“Just how different the genders are when it comes to ending a relationship may come as a shock, especially to proud blokes.”

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