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6 Ways You Know You've Been "festivalled"

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As festival season approaches and we all start gearing up for the best beer-chugging, pizza-scoffing, stranger-hugging, shower-avoiding time of our lives we thought we’d better have a check list ready for the aftermath to make sure we did it properly.

  1. FestivalOne of your arms is now a shrine to festival life
For every festival you’ve attended you’ve kept the wristband on. This isn’t (it ‘definitely’ is) an attempt to be seen by your mates as the king/queen of nomadic living; the cool, carefree anti materialist that you’ve become after a couple of weeks in a tent.

It’s much more than that. It’s a representation of everything you stand for: a love of music, the outdoors, a passion for drinking, an aversion to washing and an acceptance of your new natural eau de parfum.

  1. Wellington boots are now your go-to footwear
And not just because you’re off to meet Fernella and Henrietta down at the riding stables. Quite simply, you know that you have to be prepared at all times for the floor beneath you to transform into a glorious mud bath.

Sure, they were probably a little unnecessary at Coachella but they worked a treat at Creamfields.

  1. You’ve spent all the money you ever had
You took physical, cold hard cash for convenience. You lost at least a quarter of it during various drunken escapades in which you danced (thrashed your body around) and then stumbled (crawled) into your tent afterwards.

And that’s before we mention the cost of the tickets - unless of course you were one of the smart guys that volunteered and got the ticket for free, plus a few meals along the way. You’ll also kick yourself for not thinking of that in the first place.

  1. You’ve developed an irrational fear of being alone
Every moment of your festival life has been shared – remember when you lost all your friends and ended up arm in arm with Poncho Dave, wobbling around with a half drunk bag of red wine? Or the other thousands of people that joined you in singing (screaming with a loose tune) every song in London Grammar’s set at Bestival? Or when your friends guided you back to the tent, took you to the loo and got you into bed when you were a little worse for wear?

In any case, being alone ANYWHERE is now 100% terrifying.

  1. You will have a very selective memory
Sure, your feet are falling apart, you haven’t slept for what feels like eternity, you’ve been following a strict Pot Noodle diet, being clean now means running a baby wipe under each armpit, you’ve drank enough warm beer to subdue a small bear and you’ve been holding in a number 2 to the point of actual explosion but you’ll tell yourself it was all worth it. All you’ll recall are the bright lights, great bands, tent cities and your new festival pals.

  1. When you absolutely, positively, got to get to another festival straight away
Now you’re home and wishing for nothing more than another weekend in those glorious fields with your new best friends. But you can’t afford it?

You’re spent… That’s where volunteering comes into the picture - Join the volunteer troop who make all this possible, you’ll meet new people, save loads of cash, beat all the queues, get to see all the bands, get masses of experience for your CV, enjoy extra days at the festival, your own spacious campsite with nice (less abused) loos & showers, be able to charge your phone free of charge, get access to staff entrances saving you more walking time, park your car a bit closer to your tent and get a swanky hi-viz to don whilst you are on shift. What more could anyone want at a music festival? Festaff are recruiting now!

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And if you can tick off all of these you know that despite how it sounds, prancing around in a field and partying to the point of forgetting your own name was in no way time wasted at all.

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