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News Juice - 04/03/2011


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The week started off on a weird footing – with the news that adulterous, Footballing-type Ashley Cole managed to shoot 21-year-old undergraduate Tom Cowan while ‘larking around. But we all know Cole didn’t mean to hit him, as we know he usually can’t hit his target when shooting.

Following Aaron Porter’s comments last week about the NUS’s “historical” campaign against the rise in the tuition fees cap – his points were further echoed in reality when yet decided not to charge £9,000 a year for all its courses.

News Juice would again like to congratulate Porter on his historic victory!

Journalists aren’t at all lazy! There is absolutely no evidence to the contrary.
Student journalists at The Tab – an independent student-run paper in Cambridge, runs a story about jolly ex-Newsround presenter Lizo Mzimba getting a little over jolly (in a sexually inappropriate way). This not being entirely accurate; Mzimba takes legal action and The Tab retract it and apologise. But wait, this isn’t before national newspapers The Daily Mail and the Independent (who have absolutely no resources for unimportant things like fact checking) pick up on the story and re-run it. Of course they apologise and retract the piece the piece they have copied – I mean who in their right mind doesn’t apologise when they are wrong?
In no way did they refuse a retraction and have to pay Mzimba a settlement – that would be crazy!

We love a good student hoax, right? But we reckon that the culprits in the 1967 UFO ‘rag-week hoax’ that saw the government seriously consider the fact we were under alien invasion and call out the military, weren’t expecting it to be so effective.

New files released this week show that early in the morning of 4th September police and RAF were flooded with calls from the public reporting six small “flying saucers” that had been discovered in locations in a perfect line across Southern England from the Sheppey to the Bristol Channel. Four police forces, bomb disposal units, the army and the MoD’s intelligence branch were all mobilised, before it emerged the saucers were a rag-day hoax by engineering students from Farnborough Technical College.

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