Wait, did North Korea just put a man on the sun?
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Is that what actually *cough* happened? Or is it a hoax, dreamt up by those pesky opponents of Kim Jong-un, who just want to make him look like a really massive silly? We can’t say, but either way, we’re hearing that North Korea has this very morning landed a man on the sun, and we feel obliged to share this news with you. Landing a man on the sun isn’t the only surprising aspect of the story, though. It might seem amazing but the 18-hour solo journey, undertaken by 17-year-old nephew of Kim Jong-un, Hung Il Gong, took only four hours – which is pretty impressive, considering that this meant he was definitely travelling at a whopping 37,400,000km per hour. Speedy! The exciting news was broken by waterfordwhispersnews.com, before spreading to various other news outlets and forums. It was reported that a North Korean state news anchorman said during a live broadcast, "We are very delighted to announce a successful mission to put a man on the sun. North Korea has beaten every other country in the world to the sun. Hung Il Gong is a hero and deserves a hero's welcome when he returns home later this evening." waterfordwhispersnews.com also added that “Hung traveled in the cover of darkness, as it would protect him from the harsh, and extreme temperatures of the Sun. Hung will also be bringing back some sun spot samples for his uncle, which I'm sure he will show off to the world in a short amount of time.” Dennis Rodman has so far failed to comment on what North Korea is (allegedly) calling “the greatest human achievement of all time”, but we’re eagerly anticipating the moment that he does.
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