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TV: What to watch this week

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Comic Relief 2011, BBC, Friday – The pivotal point in the BBC’s year as hundreds of celebs get in on the act to raise money for those less fortunate. It really is the best line up yet with some genius ideas and plenty of surprises. Such as a ‘Fake That’ audition process with David Walliams, Catherine Tate, John Bishop and Alan Carr lining up to audition for the nation’s 5 favourite crooners. James Corden also features, with his Smithy sketch also the highlight of the night, with every detail being kept under wraps after last year’s speech at Sports Personality of The Year Awards, who knows whats next, The Oscars? Tune in and give whatever you can to help those abroad and here in desperate need of your help. And laugh hysterically as Lenny Henry fails to make more than 5% of the audience laugh at any one time.

Lily Allen: From Rags to Riches, Tuesday 10pm, C4 – Pop princess and vocal madam Lily Allen takes on the mother of retail, Mary Queen of Shops when opening her vintage store in Covent Garden. Mary has said the shop ‘will not work as a business’ and confronts Lily in the boardroom about her ideas, to which Ms Allen storms off. Expect a real battle of ego’s and some fantastic one liners from some of the cattiest women in the business.

Mrs Brown’s Boys, BBC1 10.35pm – If you haven’t caught this Father Ted inspired comedy show, you need to have a quiet word with yourself. It is AMAZING.

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Caroline QuentinCaroline Quentin’s: A passage through India, ITV, Tuesday 9pm - The actress travels through India in a hope to discover the real India, it’s culture, people and faith. Yes. You have seen it all before.

Dispatches, Monday 8pm, C4 – This episode looks at the government’s spending, and looks to see where the money is actually going. Basically gets you as angry as possible about the whole goddarn situation, and continues Dispatches plight to make us all chain ourselves to the gates of Downing Street. Something we can actually do something about please, C4?

Soap Dish

Coronation Street – Our favourite leopard-wearing land lady is back and is disgusted to see how Becky’s and Steve’s life seems to have crumbled since being away. Liz is not impressed to see Tracy behind the bar, expect sparks to fly! Meanwhile, little Chesney is all grown up as him and girlfriend Katy decide to move in together (although there may be an addition to the family soon... shh!). And after Frank’s aggressive launch at Maria, she tries to warn Tracy away from the love rat, but will she listen?

Eastenders – Ricky loses the plot when he finds out that his son has been suspended from school whilst Connor tries to make a move on Carol when she goes to see him about Whitney’s whereabouts. Lauren and Janine are horrified when they find out Whitney has been sleeping with Rob’s mates to pay off his debts. Nice.

Emmerdale- The saga that is Derek’s rape case comes to a disappointing standstill as the police say that there isn’t enough evidence to charge Derek. Zak decides there is in his minds, and hands out his own punishment. Meanwhile, Amy is allowed to be fostered by Val and Eric and Aaron decides to watch Jackson’s video diary after receiving the cold shoulder from Jackson, and is upset by what he sees.

Guess Who: Our telly insider dishes the dirt... well, almost!

Guess which soap beauty’s boyfriend is so keen to try and get on the show that he is publicly requesting to make and appearance, despite his band mates efforts for him to ‘act cool’?

Which TV judge spends more time in the make-up chair than any of the ladies, and even met his long term partner by doing so?

Which comedian has said he is glad to have ditched his sidekick to ‘do my own projects’ in an attempt to raise his own profile, overshadowed by his partner immensely?

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