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TV: What to watch this week

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Coach Trip, C4, 5.30pm, weeknights  – If you haven’t seen this programme, a) what rock have you been hiding under and b) you can send your apologies direct to me. This programme is pure, indulgent, hilarious perfection. Brendan Sheerin takes the wheel in the next series of this gem of a programme, with his witty, camp disposition... ‘I’m an international guide, don’t you know?!’ Watch, watch, and watch, you won’t regret it.

 

Heston’s Mission Impossible, C4, 9pm, Tuesday– The little gremlin of food TV shows is back again. This time taking on some of the worst food in the country, in hospitals, aeroplanes and cinemas. But how will the flavoured-wallpaper-loving, and ‘blackbird’ pie-baking king be received in the institutions? I’ve had a sneak peak, and the results are hilarious. They no likey.

 

Let’s Dance for Comic Relief, BBC1, 7pm, Saturday- Jordan, Lulu, Noel Fielding are just some of the big stars taking part in this year’s big comic relief gig. The stars learn their routines in gruelling 8 hour training sessions every day. Last year’s winner Rufus Hound astounded us all with his Cheryl Cole routine, so what will we see this year? Katie Price as MC Hammer, Penny Smith as Ice T or even Ed Byrne as Justin Timberlake? Well worth watching and donating some pennies too.

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Glee – E4, 9pm Monday – A series that has gone well and truly off the rails, even the most die-hard fan is beginning to get bored of the show. Personally, ever since the writers decided to take on The Rocky Horror Picture Show, the show lost respect and any hint of irony that has regaled throughout. Glee, you’re a Mickey-take, remember that.

Treme – Sky Atlantic, - It’s beautiful, heartfelt and all about a huge issue, the neglect of the people of New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina struck. It stars Dan Goodman (YES THE MAN WHO WAS THE VOICE OF THE DAD IN DINOSAURS... DISNEY CHANNEL? 90’s? REMEMBER?!). All great, but can you understand a word that is being said? Nope, me neither

Soap dish

Coronation Street, ITV – The McDonald’s win £5,000 in a casino and Dev receives the money, with a note saying ‘sorry’, in pay back for the money stolen by Becky on the night of the train crash. On the money theme, Eileen is arrested for fraud after stealing money from work, and romeo David Platt falls in love with a cage dance called ‘Candy’, soon to be revealed as someone very different.

Eastenders, BBC- Kim’s new B&B opens up, but it’s not long before the memories flood back for Denise about the flood and it is all too much for here. Elsewhere, a tipsy Whitney makes a move on Max, and in true Eastenders timing, Lauren walks in as it happens. And cockney favourite Alfie goes all out in order to win Kat round after last week’s antics.

Emmerdale, ITV – Nicola grows more and more suspicious as she sees money has gone missing from her and Jimmy’s account, only for the police to find his blood splattered van, with no Jimmy inside. Lisa finally cracks and spills that Derek raped her, to all the women in the factory. This causes her to pluck up the courage to finally go to the police and tell them what happened. Also, exes Aaron and Jackson share a drink and realise the spark is still there.

Guess who? Our telly insider dishes the dirt (well, almost!)

Which dishy star actually worked as a servant in a Russian billionaire’s home, prior to his acting career?

Which soap actor keeps getting in to hot water after making repeat comments about the lack of air time he gets, via a twitter rant?

Which beautiful British actor has left behind her husband, and child, in order to pursue a steamy romance with a co-star?

Which uber-popular TV star is gaining a reputation as a real ladies man, despite claiming having a happy, healthy relationship at home?

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