Coming out at uni
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Writing this shouldn’t be difficult at all; I myself came out at university almost two years ago. But it’s surprisingly tricky. This is perhaps because there’s not a rule book on coming out and there’s definitely no set way of doing it. Everyone discovers themselves in different ways and at different times. It wouldn’t be viable to tell someone how or when to make their sexuality public. But for people about to start university who may be in the situation I was a couple of years ago, about to start a brand new life in a brand new place, I can definitely share some advice. Firstly, it’s important to note that before I began university, the confusion I was suffering from regarding my sexuality was weighing me down. I wasn’t confident in the person I was at all, I’d never told a soul I was gay and I was probably the complete opposite to the person I am now. This isn’t all because of coming out: I felt like I had to do it and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I think I was fairly lucky in my coming out process; I never encountered any problems other than ones caused by me, like nerves. I just bit the bullet and went for it. It’s not an easy thing to do, of course. In fact, at the time it’ll seem like one of the hardest thing you’ll ever do. What’s important is that deep inside you know that you’ve accepted yourself and that you’re happy or on the way to being happy with who you are. If this is the case, there’s no reason at all why you should be hiding away. There are lots of different ways to come out, face to face being the most obvious. But via text or a letter is also aesthetically possible, even if it seems like the wrong way of going about it. I’ve done all three and they all worked fine, in their own ways. None of them affected the long term results and coming out via text is actually a great way to set up a face to face meet up. There’s one thing you should probably avoid, though; telling people when you’re drunk. Whilst I won’t lie and say that’s something I’ve never done, by doing this you do run the risk of them forgetting and having to tell them all over again. It’s also likely that as a person under the influence, you’ll have totally blurred and poor judgement; it’s much better to sit down and chat to someone when you’re sober. That way you know you’re definitely ready for them to know.
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